The Eurovision Song Contest is fast approaching! We covered part one of the semifinals last week on a Patreon exclusive episode of What In The World with Adam Tod Brown and Quincy Johnson II. This week, we’re covering the second semifinal round and this episode is free to the entire damn public. Check it out on iTunes, Spotify, Soundcloud, and wherever else fine podcasts are downloaded.
Give it a listen and watch the videos along with us! We posted them shits below! We even left Adam’s original notes under each one! Let’s get started!
Alexander Rybak – “That’s How You Write A Song” (Representing Norway)
This guy fucking gets it. Also there’s a “dance video” version of this and for some reason all the dancers mimic playing a trombone whenever the guitar riff happens. How are you dancers but also have clearly never heard music before?
The Humans – “Goodbye” (Representing Romania)
These motherfuckers are absolutely vampires. I’m not buying that “The Humans” shit for one second.
Sanja Ilic & Balkanika – “Nova deca” (Representing Serbia)
Man, I didn’t even know they were still making Lord of the Rings sequels. Also this is absolutely the most European thing I’ve ever seen. All it needs is kids drinking wine somewhere in the background.
Jessika feat. Jenifer Brening – “Who We Are” (Representing San Marino)
Right off the bat, if your name is Jessika do you really need to feature a Jenifer on the song too? Oh, wait, holy shit, is Jenifer those robots? That would be crazy dope. Also where are they filming this? I feel like she’s gonna be bid on by human traffickers after this performance.
Rasmussen – “Higher Ground” (Representing Denmark)
Was really hoping this would be a Stevie Wonder cover. Instead I think that’s Jared Leto on lead chants. I feel like this song is for sure about keeping Denmark pure or something. I don’t like it one bit. Also he looks like the Techno Viking
Julia Samoylova – “I Won’t Break” (Representing Russia)
I assume this song is about being interrogated by the CIA about Russian meddling in the 2016 election. Also, she doesn’t look well.
DoReDos – “My Lucky Day” (Representing Moldova)
Fuck yeah! This is what we practice all week for, Quincy! HE’S ON A PAYPHONE! I feel like they filmed this in 1996 and it’s just taken that long to all the way upload to the internet.
Waylon – “Outlaw in ‘Em” (Representing the Netherlands)
THIS IS CULTURAL APPROPRIATION!!!!!!
Jessica Mauboy – “We Got Love” (Representing Australia)
Nice try, Australia. You’re not Europe.
Iriao – “For You” (Representing Georgia)
They’re described as an “ethno-jazz band.” What the motherfuck is that supposed to mean? Are they trying to trick us into thinking they’re from Atlanta? I bet Russia wishes they could give this place back after hearing this song, amirite?!?!?!? Because Russia annexed Georgia after the 2008 Russo-Georgian War!
Gromee feat. Lukas Meijer – “Light Me Up” (Representing Poland)
I honestly didn’t know they had sun in Poland until this very moment. Also if this guy is feeling weak he should take off that crazy ass Children of the Corn hat and those fifteen pound David Koresh glasses.
Christabelle – “Taboo” (Representing Malta)
It’s cool that she was able to just film this in her living room. Also, this video makes me want to move to beautiful Poland.
To hear part one of our Eurovision episode (and next week’s part three) subscribe now on Patreon! It’s just $5 per month and you get lots of bonus content that you can’t get anywhere else.